Raising Her Daughter In Spokane Part Three

Mom would often share with me over the years that while she had been reluctant to be overly encouraging of my desire to be Yvonne that it became quite evident there was much more to my desire once she noticed that I started liking boys.

According to her it was soon apparent to her that I liked dressing in pretty dresses because I wanted the boys to think I was pretty.

"Boys!  Boys! Boys!  Sometimes that is all you would talk about.  I almost hated to send you outside to play because I knew you would come bakc in with some new crush on one of the neighbor boys."

Just as I have no way of knowing with any certainty how I came to prefer life as a girl, I cannot explain why or how I came to like boys more than girls.  Did I want to be a girl partially because I knew as a girl I would be allowed to like boys?  Or did I like boys because I knew as a girl I was suppose to like boys.

Mon has a favorite picture of me posing with my older brother Ryan. While she did not discuss it as such when I was younger, when I was older and dating boys, she would point it out as a prefect example of how early my interest in boys started.

I am not saying that she really felt as though I was looking at Ryan's crotch.  It simply was one interpretation of the photo that made it a bit more interesting.

While this is not the time when I will be discussing my relationship with Ryan and my other two brothers, it might be relevant at this point to share that several years later I would often get to see exactly what Ryan had in his pants.  And what he had often ended up in my ass or my mouth.